"I think it's when the crops don’t get enough sleep."
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Election 2008 | The Latest Poop
Palestinians Prepare for Moon Launch
Combining its fleet of homemade rocket-launchers with Iranian missile technology, the Hamas Space Agency (HASA) announced today it has begun the countdown for its first mission to the moon.
The Skunk UFO Project
Featured Whiff
WASHINGTON, DC — Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson announced today that the United States has allotted $200 billion of the recently passed congressional economic bailout to be played on table games in Las Vegas. “It’s quite simple,” explained Paulson. “We take some of that bailout money and put it on two or three numbers on the roulette [...]
The LexiCON: Conservative Lingo Exposed
- mar · riage (mar' ij) n. Union between a man and the woman he will eventually leave for his younger, more attractive mistress. SEE: JOHN MCCAIN. #
- com·pas·sion·ate con·ser·va·tive n.
Expression used to make right-wing lawmakers and their heartless policies seem a lot nicer.
USAGE: "The compassionate conservative voted against medical care for the homeless." #
- in-tel-li-gent de-sign (in-tel-i-juhnt di-zahyn) n.
Term invented to trick school districts into teaching creationism.
USAGE: "The universe was created by Intelligent Design. Republicans, not so much." #
- ac-tiv-ist judge (ak' tiv ist juj) n. the doctrine that anytime a court's ruling is contrary to one's own opinion, the justice shall be referred to as an "activist judge."
USAGE: "The order for the Senator to stay 300 feet away from elementary schools was given by an activist judge." #
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